Look into the face of evil.

We woke up early the morning of our boat trip, and took some time to take in the morning sights.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lovely area isn’t it? Crashing waves, a cute little light-house… world renowned golf courses…

Little did we know that all of this beauty was about to be forgotten… overshadowed by pure evil and punishment…

That’s it. Look into the heart of evil.

Whale Watching!! It sounds fun right? I mean, how often do you get to see whales? Well let me tell you. Save your money. Go to Sea World. Look at the whales and other sea dwellers there. If you absolutely still want to go on an expedition, send $50 per person to my paypal account, and I in return, will show up to your house, spray you down with water, put a blindfold over your eyes so that you see NOTHING, rock you back and forth randomly and uncomfortably until you feel like vomiting, and then lock you in a walk in freezer.

This is the rock wall leaving the harbor. This is also the most sea life that we saw at any point of the trip. Here’s a little known fact for those interested, I… apparently… get sea sick. Now, I have no problem being on a boat when I’m outside in plain sight of the ocean and the horizon. However, it was cold, foggy, and kind of raining. So, I went “inside” of the boat to warm up and dry off a bit. That’s when my stomach decided that it would rather live outside of my body. I managed to prevent it from doing this, but in order to keep from vomiting, (like the poor little Asian girl did) I had to remain outside. In the cold, wet foggy nastiness. To make the boat trip even more of a magic journey, the Marine Biologist piloting the boat was rather proud to tell us that she didn’t use any “fish finder” or “SONAR” … she just puttered on out to the ocean and “looked” for whales. I don’t know why this didn’t sink in from the beginning… if it had, we probably would have jumped off of the boat right then. So… follow me on this magic journey. We’re on a boat. In the Pacific. “Looking” for whales… cause… why bother with technology? I mean… it’s just the Pacific Ocean right? and whales are frickin HUGE!!! How hard can it be to run into a few right? Yeah.

So… fast forward… we’ve been on the boat for roughly… 4 hours… We’re both cold (and I don’t get cold) … and ready to get the hell back to the car, and get to our next destination. Well guess what… because the powers that be have a lovely sense of humor, el capitan saw some Dall’s Porpoises. They’re these black and while dolphin looking things… and guess what? They like to bow ride. It’s called bow riding, because they ride (AKA “Swim” for non mentally handicapped people) next to the bow. Look at the Bow ride! They’re bow riding! Let’s circle around again and see if we can get them to bow ride!!! About 30 seconds more of this, and I was going to climb the ladder up to the captain's perch, and grab this lady by the arms and through the art of “Bow Tossing” was going to encourage her to take a swim with the magical mammals.

I could really go on about this for DAYS. But… I must continue with the rest of the trip.

As before, if my story of the above doesn’t touch you deeply, and you still want to go whale watching, let me know. I’ll tell you where to send the money.